Doubting myself and the skill of my hands is like spiralling down the rabbit hole in Alice in Wonderland. Never read the book but I watched Australian MKR. The Tasmanian contestants used the “Wonderland” theme and I was starting to feel like them in their kitchen. I didn’t want to cry though because according to the mother and daughter beauty queens team, “Crying is a sign of weakness”. Makes me want to slap the daughter and see if I can produce some tears.
Ooops pardon me. This is not a post about “My Kitchen Rules”.
Feedback in Samoa (ok just my family lol) on my little weaving creations were very humbling (cue outward humility while doing my jig and waving hands in the air in my mind). Yeah, I do “humble” really well on the outside.
My family were “astounded” I say, at how I could weave. I didn’t know whether to be offended at first. They were baffled at how I could weave when I don’t live in Samoa. Secondly, how could I possibly weave with something as delicate as curling ribbon. (Well you know, I’m just awesome)
(Cue professional sounding expert) I shared my story with them. The kids school project and learning from a master weaver to create what is now dubbed as “The Golden Mat”. (oooo I love that) Explained the intricacies of working with ribbon and the satisfaction it brings me to create cultural art with contemporary materials. (Can’t remember what made up Samoan words I used)
Ooooo’s, ahhhhh’s and Samoan wow’s (oka oka ia oe, ese lou poto – wow to you, you are so clever). Yeah tell me about it, I non-humbly say in my head. At least it wasn’t the other kind of “WOW” I got from my uncles with the added handspans making me out the size of a whale.
Seeking some serious weaving tutorials from my family of weaving experts kind of didn’t really happen except the one time I was taught how to make a pola (Samoan blind and when pola’s are attached together they work like roman blinds).
Tables turned, I showed one family member how to make flowers and lilies so she can bust out her awesomeness when it’s her turn to decorate the church. I showed mum how to make fancy lolly lei’s (ula lole) and left her some arrangements she can unravel in her own time. I have verbal contracts (lol) to supply SWHQ bling for a souvenir shop that my aunty is going to incorporate (undoubtedly the most relaxation I ever got) at Sevemanaia Beach Fale’s in Savai’i (that was totally a plug and you gotta go there)
WOW! Just reminiscing on my trip I feel I am on the right track with my weaving. Unique and original. Personal and handmade from the heART. I think I have shaken the “fraudster” now I think back to those reactions.
There is so much I want to do and only one pair of hands. The mind is furiously creating and filing ideas.
BREATHE LADY! (cause otherwise I
might will die if I don’t)
Before anyone asks me for orders or my family harasses me again to SELL SELL SELL, I have this to say…..
Everything I do is an expression of who I am.
I work from the heart.
It satisfies my soul.
The process is unravelling myself and my life.
My intention is always to produce ART first.
Secondly, to serve the communities I am a part of.
The money will come. There is a (loose) plan.
So you better start saving now bwahahahahaha. Hopefully I am not all unravelled and get all tangled up.
P.S. HAPPY VALENTINES DAY EVERYONE <3